Intro
Some thoughts distort reality. Spotting them improves mood, behavior, and relationships.
Lesson
When we predict that things will go wrong, we neglect the truth: The future is uncertain.
Preview
We often magnify molehills into mountains. Probing your sense of scale brings relief.
The mind selectively weights the negative. Correct the scale by giving yourself due credit.
We don't know others' thoughts. When we act like we do, we mistake assumption for fact.
Anxiety can feel like vigilance, but it doesn't provide safety, and it robs us of peace.
We tend to focus on threats. Resilience comes from recognizing our ability to cope.
We explain away our own faults, but not others'. This isn't fair—or good for relationships.
When we insist on being right, we risk forfeiting what matters more than momentary victory.
For a day, give everyone the benefit of the doubt, whether or not they seem to deserve it.
Moralized judgments create pressure. Personal preferences create motivation and acceptance.
Revenge seems to promise justice and satisfaction, but only the high road delivers these.
Unpleasant experiences are usually more bearable than our automatic reactions suggest.
"Rushing tends to produce exactly what you're trying to avoid: stress or disappointment."
Routine tasks rarely are burdens. Our associations often make them feel burdensome.
When you expect little, what occurs is often surprising—and cause for gratitude.
Exercise
Carry your past in one palm, your future in the other. Notice the untouched space between.
We are wired to chase, not to arrive. Recognizing this helps us value where we already are.
To fear a future event is to anticipate suffering that may never occur.
Opposites and extremes are simple and clear. The true picture is complex and shaded.
Being alone can feel heavy, yet that very feeling unites us with all who have ever lived.
Notice a tough emotion. Identify the story it's telling. Let it go. Find a more helpful one.
Our brains mistake the intensity of our feelings as evidence of their reliability.
When we judge past choices based on present knowledge, we squander lessons for the future.
Every skill you now have was once a challenge. Why assume your future skills are different?
We over-extrapolate from past data. Instead, bring a beginner’s mind to present facts.
As children, we had little power. As adults, we overlook the fact that we have far more.
The disapproval we expect rarely comes. And when it does, it rarely costs us what we feared.
Self-blame can feel like accountability, but it brings guilt, not agency.
The fear of wasting past investments can keep us from making better ones in the present.
When your well-being is based on external conditions, it vanishes with the next setback.
Distortions don’t disappear with practice, but become more visible and more avoidable.
Unlock full audio with trial
Series
Start your free trial today to listen to all 32 sessions in this series.
Artwork by Alicia Bock